Marshawn Lynch On Film, From Game Tape To Local Cable Advertising

Share |

In this era of professional football, running backs tend to be as treasured and as long-lasting as a disposable razor. And yet, in spite of that, there is Marshawn Lynch.

Thanks to other metropolitan media markets, you might recognize Lynch as the gold-toothed eye at the center of the Super Bowl coverage storm. Here in Seattle, he is ours—well, for now, as he is always and forever Oakland’s—for the fifth glorious consecutive season. And, hey: keep your grubby little takes off him.

Enigmatic? Yes, Lynch certainly is. More accurately and more importantly, he has one of the driest, most refined senses of humor of any public figure you’ll see, and he won’t compromise his sensibility to help a hits-thirsty reporter file that salacious scoop-quote. All it takes is a quick dig through YouTube to reveal a vast treasure trove of Lynch being his hilarious self.

For instance, back when Lynch was with the Bills, here he is matching Kenny Mayne deadpan for deadpan as the two explored Buffalo’s nightlife:

Or here’s Lynch all the way back in his high school days at Oakland, yet unjaded by the media, a clip that Pete Carroll uploaded on his personal YouTube channel:

And there’s Lynch being incredibly open, detailed, and hilarious about The Run—of course, he’s only decided to be so open because he’s being interviewed by a Spanish channel, so why not:

Though available for worldwide consumption, these moments of supreme Lynch-ness may come as a surprise for viewers who were only familiar with Marshawn’s unique vow of silence/non-silence at the Super Bowl.

Here in Seattle, however, there is a moment of Lynch goofiness that we have all witnessed perhaps dozens of times, a thirty-second slice of video work that provides significant insight into the values and priorities of Marshawn Lynch. Game day heroics aside, a kitschy local ad spot is the primary method that Seattle has been given to know and love its Beast Mode.

Consider that, in this 2014 season, Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson and Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman have leapt into the uppermost strata of NFL players who appear in national commercials. On Sundays, Wilson and Sherman have quickly become inescapable, joining similarly ubiquitous players like Clay Matthews, Aaron Rodgers, Drew Brees, Colin Kaepernick, Robert Griffin III, Justin Tuck (still!) and of, course, Peyton Manning as the NFL’s most visible endorsers. (Sorry not sorry, Brian Orakpo.)

Since Lynch is just as important to the Seahawks’ wildly sustainable success as either Wilson or Sherman, it stands to reason that, if Lynch desired, he too could be beaming at you between quarters while enjoying the plentiful benefits of the nationally distributed soft drink/insurance coverage/headphones/fantasy platform/sandwich in question.

Instead, he’s on heavy rotation in greater Seattle in a commercial for Beacon Plumbing, which boasts the brilliant catch-phrase, “Stop freakin’, call Beacon!”  

Please witness:

This commercial gives us access to a fantastical alternate universe in which Lynch not only works as a plumber but he also possesses several extrahuman superpowers. Consider the following features of this beautiful world, and his place within it:

  • Lynch boldly saunters to the front door with nary a tool in hand or on belt. Even without knowing the specific nature of this particular plumbing crisis, Lynch has already anticipated that he will be able to solve any foreseeable problem with his bare hands.

  • The family beset by these issues immediately
    recognizes Lynch and his tackle-busting alter-ego, “Beast Mode.”
    From this, the viewer is led to believe that Lynch has maintained his
    regular job as Seattle Seahawks running back, and has become a Beacon plumber on the side and/or in the offseason.

  • When confronted with the dilemma of a clogged kitchen sink, Marshawn’s solution is to send a stiff-arm, if you will, deep into the drain, a move powerful enough to rock the foundations of the house with seismic tremors. He extricates a plastic ball from the drain, immediately solving the problem. From this, it seems reasonable to hypothesize that Lynch-as-plumber is gifted with some sort of extrasensory perception, with which he is able to sense plumbing snafus that are not visible to the conventional human eye. More on this “Plumber’s ESP,” or PESP, a bit later.

  • By effortlessly removing an entire toilet from the bathroom, it would
    appear at first glance that Lynch-as-plumber has been gifted with
    exceptional strength. But the Lynch of this universe already has
    considerable strength. Look closer. Lynch-as-plumber has, in fact, been gifted with the ability to read minds: He has already removed the entire toilet before the client has finished her sentence recommending that he do so.

  • It could be argued that by sending Lynch on a third task, the client is
    at this point taking advantage of Lynch’s services, and the speed and ease with which he has solved the previous two plumbing dilemmas. By simply crouching on the client’s lawn, Lynch is able to perform an underground scan that confirms the structural integrity of the sprinkler system. This moment also serves as confirmation that Lynch-as-plumber has indeed been gifted with PESP, as he has performed this task in a way that a conventional human would simply be unable to do.

  • To conclude the commercial, we are given further confirmation of Lynch’s exceptional strength. He bursts through a cement wall, Kool-Aid Man-style, sweeping the cinderblocks aside with only his open hands.

It’s worth wondering what, exactly, Beacon Plumbing is advertising about
their services with this campaign. I will assume that their plumbers do not work with quite the speed and superpowers that Lynch-as-plumber possesses, and I will also assume that Marshawn Lynch himself has not once been dispatched for service calls. I propose this interpretation: With this advertisement, Beacon Plumbing is showcasing their ability to secure Marshawn Lynch to act in a commercial, a feat that precious few other business have yet to accomplish. Is this not a truly mighty
selling point?

And so, if Lynch has ever seemed like a mumbly hermit to you over his last, terse week, remember that here in Seattle, we have constantly watched him lift toilets and walk through cement walls for his fellow Washingtonians. In so doing, Lynch has proven himself to be one of us, similarly un-immune to the hassles of household chores. He will answer only the questions he wishes to answer, but perhaps this toilet-hoisting generosity is one of those answers.

Share |

Comments

I constantly emailed this site post page to all my friends, because if prefer to read it then my all friends will too.
food court in hyderabad

Nice written!! I have been a big fan of your blogs. thanks
Visit this website

I’m trampled by your contents carry on the wonderful work.
Mark Curry Macfarlane Group

This is highly informatics, crisp and clear. I think that everything has been described in systematic manner so that reader could get maximum information and learn many things. News

All child molesters are pedophiles. The only treatment that works for sex offenders is execution. MEN LOOKING FOR LAHORE ESCORTS SERVICES

Good focuses you composed here..Great stuff...I think you've made some really fascinating points.Keep up the great work. دیجیتال مارکتینگ

Wonderful article, thanks for putting this together! This is obviously one great post. Thanks for the valuable information and insights you have so provided here. Thermal Blinds

Find the best escorts in Nice, female models, independent escorts and adult services with photos. High-class female adult escorts models and companions service in Nice. Female escorts in Nice, new listings posted daily, including pics, prices, reviews and extra search filters. Fulfill your fantasies with our beautiful high-class girls in Nice. Get appointment today! Annuaire d'escorte a Nice

Extraordinary article Lot's of data to Read...Great Man Keep Posting and upgrade to People..Thanks Wedding photo editing service

Very useful post. This is my first time i visit here. I found so many interesting stuff in your blog especially its discussion. Really its great article. Keep it up. Buy Diablo 2 items

Your contents are too straightforward to browse and easy to understand.Amy #TRAorganics

I don’t suppose many of websites give this kind of information.Steve Clayton seven figure cycle bonus

Escorte independente, reale si verificate, profesioniste si disponibile in . Dame de companie din Constanta ce ofera servicii de lux la domiciliul clientului sau la hotel, femei de companie ce va pot insoti in vacante sau la diverse intalniri de afaceri.Dame de Companie in Constanta

Some people have what it takes to make a successful videography material out of any kind of topic. It only takes an experts eye few seconds to realize that. The video production Crystal Lake IL team will definitely agree and find him appealing for video production. The biggest challenge in this kind of business is distinguish the good selling material from the non-selling one. And then of course, it comes the production part...

You will find a lot of approaches after visiting your post. I was exactly searching for. Thanks for such post and please keep it up. 600 Dofollow Blog Comments

Its a great pleasure reading your post.Its full of information I am looking for and I love to post a comment that "The content of your post is awesome" Great work Dofollow Blog Comments

Wonderful, just what a blog it is! This blog has provided the helpful data to us continue the good work. I definitely enjoying every little bit of it. It is a great website and nice share. I want to thank you. Good job! You guys do a great blog, and have some great contents. Keep up the good work. 100% Manually, So your site is safe you can get all HQ links, that definitely increase your SERPs. 20 High Quality Backlinks gig Only for fiverr members just for 5$ WOww...high trust flow backlinks

I wanna thanks to a great extent for providing such informative and qualitative material therefore often.medical website

You create sense out of the foremost complex topics.the quantum success coaching academy

Nobody can reject the info you have given in the blogs, this is actually a great work.Inbox Blueprint 2.0 Bonuses