The Clog

In which LeBron's failure is praised as if it isn't a failure at all.

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We're not allowed to embed the extremely good rap anthem that Russell Wilson recorded to impress his teammates and cement his relationship with some of America's most popular brands. It's complicated. But we do have a transcript.

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In which, for the 14,951st time, someone says Washington cannot be saved.

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In which a lot of stuff is going on with the author, some of it involving the Bulls.

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In which Z-Bo's arm fat gets the love it deserves.

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In which a bunch of adjectives get dumped on Billy Donovan's angular head.

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...and with it, the battle is rejoined. Tonight, our heroes rejoin the battle, and provide a healthy Gruden-free alternative—and jokes, and music, and a fourth quarter guest—to a Monday night tradition.

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In which all the ways Monta Ellis is like Paul Beatty are delineated.

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In which the NBA's most aesthetically pleasing team dissolves, and reforms as something altogether less inspiring.

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In which just a whole bunch of bile is dispersed, like a whale pissing into the sea.

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