The Clog en Cootball Fards Vol. 2: Football Cards, Spoonerized For Safety <p> Donrad Cobler, Larnell Cake, and other collectible and tastefully spoonerized NFL delicacies.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Classical Recurrences Football Cards Spoonerisms NFL Thu, 28 Aug 2014 20:01:12 +0000 David Roth 2033 at Off The Bat, Episodes 18 and 19: Groundskeeping In Purgatory <p> In which Off The Bat&#39;s unlimited access and no-holds barred approach equal Fat Joe riding a groundskeeper&#39;s tractor in Miami and Nick Castellanos answering questions about pancakes.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Classical Recurrences Fat Joe Cheesing On A Tractor Off The Bat Television Fri, 22 Aug 2014 18:53:33 +0000 David Roth 2029 at Cootball Fards: Priceless Spoonerized NFL Collectibles <p> Spoonerisms are stupid. So here are some spoonerized football cards for you to treasure. Respect, Mandy Ross.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Classical Recurrences Football Cards PhotoShoppery Spoonerisms NFL Wed, 20 Aug 2014 20:32:07 +0000 David Roth 2027 at The Power of the Punch <p> Brock Lesnar&#39;s slaughtering of WWE&#39;s golden goose John Cena at SummerSlam has shoved -- violently -- reality back in the face of fans. And created a lie you can believe in.&nbsp;</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Mon, 18 Aug 2014 23:55:03 +0000 Nick Bond 2025 at Off The Bat, Episodes 16 and 17: Designated For Assignment <p> In which Craig Kimbrel is hilarious, the Off The Bat team is grating and willfully dumb in a familiar way, and our heroes are suddenly tasked with competing for ratings with George Stephanopoulos and David Gregory.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Classical Recurrences Jerks Being Rude To Closers MTV2 Off The Bat Suspect Eyelines Television Thu, 14 Aug 2014 19:06:35 +0000 David Roth 2021 at Life On Earth, Or Goodbye <p> Sports On Earth was a good idea and a very good website. It is not fully gone, but it won&#39;t be what it was. What&#39;s left is a reminder of some things we all already know entirely too well, and a challenge.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Capitalism Extreme Corporate Wackness Internal Affairs Money Sporps Sports On Earth Sportswriting The Internet Wackness Fri, 08 Aug 2014 18:08:57 +0000 David Roth 2019 at A Peter King Story, And A Lesson About Pants <p> In which a young writer talks to Troy Vincent about best business practices and exorcises a decade-old memory of Peter King attempting to bigfoot said young writer while wearing inappropriate footwear.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Coaching Shorts First Person Peter King Things NFL Thu, 07 Aug 2014 19:38:01 +0000 David Roth 2017 at Off The Bat, Episodes 14 and 15: Let's Stop This, Please <p> It says a lot that Off The Bat&#39;s entire existence seemed to be building up to the Celebrities and Legends Softball Game during the All-Star break. It&#39;s unclear what purpose, if any, it serves now. Well, beyond grim existential metaphor, as usual.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Chris DiStefano's Face Classical Recurrences Off The Bat Old Footage Of A Laughing David Ortiz Televised Narcotics for the Whole Family Wed, 30 Jul 2014 16:55:12 +0000 David Roth 2011 at Off The Bat, Episodes 12 and 13: Rap Game Big Donkey <p> In which Adam Dunn&#39;s influence on Chief Keef is revealed, Brandon Moss looks a little like a buff George Saunders, and Fat Joe displays late movement on his fastball, sort of.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Classical Recurrences Off The Bat Television The Fat Joe Factor Wed, 16 Jul 2014 17:11:06 +0000 David Roth 2001 at Into The Cauldron: Talking to Jamie O'Grady About Medium's New Sports Site <p> Medium looks cool, and can make a viable case for Future Of Internet Publishing status. It also has a new sports website, and an editor who was willing to answer some questions about it.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Conversations Friendly Competition Sportswriting The Cauldron The Internet Wed, 09 Jul 2014 16:02:36 +0000 David Roth 1993 at Literary Football, Or The Big Words Of The World Cup <p> A pitch of writing: some unexpected commentators have made the World Cup more of a Word Cup, with delightful results. Certainly more delightful than that wordplay!</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Borges On Sports Horrifying failed puns right there in the teaser Literacy Soccer Various Reviews of Books World Cup Tue, 08 Jul 2014 16:11:39 +0000 David Roth 1994 at Nike and the Evolution of Soccer Stardom <p>Over twenty years, Nike&#39;s soccer ads have traced a change in what global athletic celebrity means. Virtues like teamwork and unity are praised, but the praise is drowned out by the positioning of athletes as disposable corporate deities.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Advertising Mostly Genial Corporate Propaganda Nike Soccer World Cup Mon, 30 Jun 2014 16:18:37 +0000 Pete Beatty 1989 at The Washington Reagans Way <p> The wit and wisdom of the only new name for the Washington NFL Team that&#39;s nearly as offensive as the old one. It&#39;s morning in Raljon, MD or somewhere.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Mr. Snyder Tear Down That Wall Or Whatever Not Real Things Ronald Reagan Washington DC Thu, 26 Jun 2014 14:39:27 +0000 David Roth 1986 at The Sound of Sporps: Classical Magazine Issue Ten/10/X Is Here <p>The latest, most triumphant return of America&#39;s most infrequently published Sporps Periodical. This issue is about the music of sports, from devotional <em>cumbias</em> about Maradona to the novelty recordings of a Yinzer sports bard.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> App-Related Internal Affairs Music Plastic Aged with Fire Sulfuric Honks The Classical Magazine Wed, 25 Jun 2014 19:45:02 +0000 Pete Beatty 1985 at Off The Bat, Episodes 10 and 11: What's New Is Not New <p> As MTV2&#39;s flirtily bizarre collaboration with Major League Baseball reaches double digits, it enters its baroque/recycling-old-stuff period. Don&#39;t worry, Fat Joe is still around.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Classical Recurrences Did You Always Want A Maserati? MTV2 Off The Bat Television Wed, 25 Jun 2014 19:26:49 +0000 David Roth 1982 at We Were Gods: Notes On An XBOX Stanley Cup <p> On the experience of winning a Stanley Cup, without so much as one loss, from a very comfortable seat.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Thu, 19 Jun 2014 16:35:25 +0000 David Roth 1975 at Off The Bat, Episodes Eight and Nine: The Keys To The MTV2 Kingdom <p> Off The Bat is now nearly ten episodes old, and still a long way from good. Instead of stressing over how and why Fat Joe still can&#39;t pronounce Yasiel Puig&#39;s name, maybe it&#39;s better to wonder how this is still on the air. The answer to that question lies in MTV2&#39;s similarly baffling existence.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> All Television Is Local Classical Recurrences Off The Bat Television Wed, 11 Jun 2014 15:53:57 +0000 David Roth 1966 at The Polanco Conundrum <p> Super-prospect Gregory Polanco is finally on his way to Pittsburgh. How and why this well-deserved call took so long to come has a lot to do with MLB&#39;s broken Super Two system, but also something to do with the micro-scale workaday weirdness of the Pirates.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Baseball Gregory Polanco MLB Pittsburgh Pirates Super Two Hijinkery The Pirates Tue, 10 Jun 2014 14:59:47 +0000 David Roth 1968 at Off The Bat, Episodes Five and Six: Now With Less Baseball! <p> In which our heroes more or less give up on the baseball aspect of things and focus more on Yo Gotti, junket-jumping, and violence against Tampa Bay Rays.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Baseball Jon Hamm Would Just As Soon Not Kicked By A Maxim Model MTV2 Off The Bat Television Fri, 06 Jun 2014 19:32:24 +0000 David Roth 1964 at Doll Day At Sox Park <p> A Saturday afternoon White Sox game is usually a profoundly restful experience. On bobble head day, it&#39;s something else entirely.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Baseball Being There Chicago Things Chicago White Sox Creepy Dolls Dispatches MLB Tue, 27 May 2014 19:27:57 +0000 David Roth 1957 at Off The Bat, Episode Five: Robinson Cano's Magical Memory Show <p> Five episodes in, &quot;Off The Bat&quot; throws a curve by delivering a really good segment. Also: crude sex idiocies and frappucino punchlines.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Classical Recurrences Off The Bat Speak Memory Television Fri, 23 May 2014 20:00:37 +0000 David Roth 1954 at Metta World Peace, Marc Maron, And The "All Wifed Out" Experience <p> Marc Maron, the defensive artist formerly known as Metta World Peace, and a bunch of mostly douchey-seeming dudes made a movie called <em>All Wifed Out</em>. There are no wives in it. It&#39;s complicated, and it&#39;s not.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Acting For Film DVDs Film Metta World Peace Podcasting Redbox Journalism Sex Take It Easy Becky You Take It Easy Becky Wed, 21 May 2014 19:30:33 +0000 David Roth 1949 at CC Sabathia And The Abyss <p> CC Sabathia visited Dr. James Andrews and escaped. And yet there is still the sense that the end is near, if not nearly here.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Baseball CC Sabathia Does Not Do Accents Empires In Eclipse Humanity MLB New York Yankees The Passage of Time Fri, 16 May 2014 16:25:28 +0000 David Roth 1944 at New Coach, Same Old <p> The Knicks got outbid on Steve Kerr, which is probably fine. It seems to have happened for the same old Knicks reasons, and that is a less good thing.</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Coaches Coaching James Dolan NBA New York Knicks Thu, 15 May 2014 19:20:51 +0000 David Roth 1943 at 4 Colombians (Barely) Enter Northern Ireland <p> Does the ghost of Pablo Escobar still loom over Colombian cyclists?&nbsp;</p> <p><a href="" target="_blank">read more</a></p> Colombia Cycling giro d'italia pablo escobar stodgy britishness Fri, 09 May 2014 18:09:02 +0000 Eric Nusbaum 1931 at