The Classical: Articles http://theclassical.org/articles en The Chief http://theclassical.org/articles/the-chief <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Jeff Kirshman </div> </div> </div> <p> For some at the University of Illinois, Chief Illiniwek remains a symbol of tradition and unity even after his official retirement in 2007. For others, The Chief is a symbol of thoughtlessness and ignorance. For Alex Dozier, who still performs as The Chief at Illini games, he means something else entirely.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/the-chief" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/the-chief#comments Tue, 26 Aug 2014 16:33:32 +0000 David Roth 2032 at http://theclassical.org Business As Usual On Moron Mountain: An Excerpt From Miles Wray's "Space Jam" Ebook http://theclassical.org/articles/business-as-usual-on-moron-mountain-an-excerpt-from-miles-wrays-space-jam-ebook <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Miles Wray </div> </div> </div> <p> An excerpt from &quot;Here&#39;s Your Chance, Do Your Dance,&quot; Miles Wray&#39;s <a href="https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/critical-review-and-interpretation-of-space-jam/x/8468537">upcoming ebook</a> on the Michael Jordan/Bugs Bunny anti-classic&nbsp;<em>Space Jam</em>&nbsp;as a movie and non-movie.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/business-as-usual-on-moron-mountain-an-excerpt-from-miles-wrays-space-jam-ebook" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/business-as-usual-on-moron-mountain-an-excerpt-from-miles-wrays-space-jam-ebook#comments Mon, 25 Aug 2014 17:00:58 +0000 David Roth 2030 at http://theclassical.org How The NFL Wins http://theclassical.org/articles/how-the-nfl-wins <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Bryan Joiner </div> </div> </div> <p> Knowing that the NFL is sinister-unto-evil is one thing. But doing something about it -- something like, say, not watching -- is another thing entirely. In the end, what the NFL is selling might be stronger than anyone&#39;s ability to resist it.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/how-the-nfl-wins" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/how-the-nfl-wins#comments Thu, 21 Aug 2014 17:21:17 +0000 David Roth 2028 at http://theclassical.org August 18, 2013 And The Arrival Of Performance-Enhanced Baseball http://theclassical.org/articles/august-18-2013-and-the-arrival-of-performance-enhanced-baseball <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Robert O&#039;Connell </div> </div> </div> <p> One year ago, in an otherwise unimportant game, a small drama played out between Alex Rodriguez, Ryan Dempster and baseball&#39;s stuffier storytelling instincts. The familiar PED hysteria was there. The difference, this time, was how it made the story so much more interesting.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/august-18-2013-and-the-arrival-of-performance-enhanced-baseball" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/august-18-2013-and-the-arrival-of-performance-enhanced-baseball#comments Mon, 18 Aug 2014 16:34:18 +0000 David Roth 2024 at http://theclassical.org Reading FC Is Fundamental http://theclassical.org/articles/reading-fc-is-fundamental <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Jacob Sundstrom </div> </div> </div> <p> For most of us, the teams we care about are chosen for us, or are accidents of birth or circumstance. For Americans adopting an English soccer team, it&#39;s a different story. It&#39;s important to choose wisely.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/reading-fc-is-fundamental" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/reading-fc-is-fundamental#comments Thu, 14 Aug 2014 15:41:17 +0000 David Roth 2023 at http://theclassical.org The Sagging Rope Expert, or Ali Boulala And The Art Of Sketchiness http://theclassical.org/articles/the-sagging-rope-expert-or-ali-boulala-and-the-art-of-sketchiness <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> B. David Zarley </div> </div> </div> <p> Skating is about a great many things, but it is not about being perfect. For all his idiocies and failings, Ali Boulala knows this, and beautifully enough to help other people know it. Which means he knows a lot, actually.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/the-sagging-rope-expert-or-ali-boulala-and-the-art-of-sketchiness" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/the-sagging-rope-expert-or-ali-boulala-and-the-art-of-sketchiness#comments Tue, 12 Aug 2014 05:53:18 +0000 David Roth 2020 at http://theclassical.org Sportsflicks: Burt Reynolds Is Sad, And "The Man From Left Field" http://theclassical.org/articles/sportsflicks-burt-reynolds-is-sad-and-the-man-from-left-field <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Tom Keiser </div> </div> </div> <p> Burt Reynolds was going through a hard time in his life when he made the 1993 un-classic <em>The Man From Left Field</em>, a singularly vain vanity project dedicated to sharing his personal turmoil, Dick Howser fetish, and a bunch of saddish Florida State in-jokes.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> 0 </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/sportsflicks-burt-reynolds-is-sad-and-the-man-from-left-field" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/sportsflicks-burt-reynolds-is-sad-and-the-man-from-left-field#comments Fri, 08 Aug 2014 14:25:18 +0000 David Roth 2018 at http://theclassical.org Yakkin' About Soccer: The Most Major League http://theclassical.org/articles/yakkin-about-soccer-the-most-major-league-0 <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Patrick Redford </div> <div class="field-item even"> Connor Huchton </div> </div> </div> <p> Our national DeAndre Yedlin moment, MLS&#39; status as the most undisputedly major league in world soccer, Andrew Farrell&#39;s tubby mastery, those times when DC United is Sunderland FC, and other important (domestic) soccer topics.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/yakkin-about-soccer-the-most-major-league-0" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/yakkin-about-soccer-the-most-major-league-0#comments Wed, 06 Aug 2014 17:54:26 +0000 David Roth 2016 at http://theclassical.org Joel-Hans Embiid, Ghost In The Twitter Machine http://theclassical.org/articles/joel-hans-embiid-ghost-in-the-twitter-machine <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> John Wilmes </div> </div> </div> <p> Joel Embiid may one day be a great basketball player. But the third overall pick of the 2014 NBA Draft is already a great follow, and one of the weirdest and best sports-things on Twitter.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/joel-hans-embiid-ghost-in-the-twitter-machine" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/joel-hans-embiid-ghost-in-the-twitter-machine#comments Mon, 04 Aug 2014 16:24:37 +0000 David Roth 2014 at http://theclassical.org Evan Turner And The Shot Chart Of Infinite Sadness http://theclassical.org/articles/evan-turner-and-the-shot-chart-of-infinite-sadness <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Ian Levy </div> </div> </div> <p> If every picture tells a story, then the shot chart from Evan Turner&#39;s horrible 2013-14 season tells a really seriously sad story. So sad, in fact, that it can apply to failures other than his own. Let&#39;s get very sad.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/evan-turner-and-the-shot-chart-of-infinite-sadness" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/evan-turner-and-the-shot-chart-of-infinite-sadness#comments Fri, 01 Aug 2014 15:41:37 +0000 David Roth 2013 at http://theclassical.org Houston Has A Problem http://theclassical.org/articles/houston-has-a-problem <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Jack Moore </div> </div> </div> <p> There was grumbling in the Houston Astros clubhouse over struggling bonus baby Mark Appel. There&#39;s plenty to complain about in Houston, but it&#39;s not necessarily Mark Appel&#39;s bullpen session.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/houston-has-a-problem" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/houston-has-a-problem#comments Wed, 30 Jul 2014 19:20:51 +0000 David Roth 2012 at http://theclassical.org The Cleveland Sockalexicon http://theclassical.org/articles/the-cleveland-sockalexicon <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Tyler Drenon </div> </div> </div> <p> It may well be that the Cleveland Indians were named after one of their first great stars. That&#39;s only sort of an explanation, and not nearly an excuse, for one of the most unfortunate mascots and team names in professional sports. Slowly but steadily, anything but change seems increasingly insufficient.&nbsp;</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/the-cleveland-sockalexicon" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/the-cleveland-sockalexicon#comments Tue, 29 Jul 2014 16:43:47 +0000 David Roth 2010 at http://theclassical.org The A's Sell Out http://theclassical.org/articles/the-as-sell-out <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Robert O&#039;Connell </div> </div> </div> <p> The Oakland Athletics were baseball&#39;s best team through the first half of the season, and recently mortgaged their future to get better. If this seems strange, you&#39;ve probably read <em>Moneyball</em>. It was a good book, but we&#39;d all do well to forget about it in this case.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/the-as-sell-out" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/the-as-sell-out#comments Mon, 28 Jul 2014 15:45:12 +0000 David Roth 1995 at http://theclassical.org Three Days And Ten Years http://theclassical.org/articles/three-days-and-ten-years <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Matt Osgood </div> </div> </div> <p> On July 24, 2004, the Boston Red Sox were still cursed and Barack Obama was an obscure State Senator. Things started changing on that day, and haven&#39;t stopped since.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/three-days-and-ten-years" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/three-days-and-ten-years#comments Thu, 24 Jul 2014 17:00:00 +0000 David Roth 2006 at http://theclassical.org Wrestling About Talking, Ep. 1: Brogue Kicks and Broken (Sand)Harts http://theclassical.org/articles/wrestling-about-talking-ep-1-brogue-kicks-and-broken-sandharts <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Lang Whitaker </div> <div class="field-item even"> Mike Piellucci </div> </div> </div> <p> Wrestling, like time is a flat circle. A flat, squared circle. It&#39;s weird.&nbsp;</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/wrestling-about-talking-ep-1-brogue-kicks-and-broken-sandharts" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/wrestling-about-talking-ep-1-brogue-kicks-and-broken-sandharts#comments Tue, 22 Jul 2014 19:08:02 +0000 Nick Bond 2008 at http://theclassical.org The Spirit of St. Louis: Ann Coulter, Nativism, and the “American Style” of Soccer http://theclassical.org/articles/the-spirit-of-st-louis-ann-coulter-nativism-and-the-%E2%80%9Camerican-style%E2%80%9D-of-soccer <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Sam Fayyaz </div> </div> </div> <p> Ann Coulter infamously cast soccer as a tool of the invading hordes that seek to destroy the United States. Decades ago, however, Americans within the sport made many of the same xenophobic arguments to protect a particular style of play.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/the-spirit-of-st-louis-ann-coulter-nativism-and-the-%E2%80%9Camerican-style%E2%80%9D-of-soccer" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/the-spirit-of-st-louis-ann-coulter-nativism-and-the-%E2%80%9Camerican-style%E2%80%9D-of-soccer#comments Tue, 22 Jul 2014 15:53:27 +0000 Eric Freeman 2007 at http://theclassical.org Fantasy, Basketball: LeBron James As Fantasy Novel Hero http://theclassical.org/articles/fantasy-basketball-lebron-james-as-fantasy-novel-hero <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Alex Siquig </div> </div> </div> <p> It&#39;s way too easy to take LeBron James&#39; career to date as something bigger than the career arc of a very great basketball player. But look at LeBron James as the main character in a sprawling series of fantasy novels and things look... well, kind of disturbingly not-that-different, actually.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/fantasy-basketball-lebron-james-as-fantasy-novel-hero" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/fantasy-basketball-lebron-james-as-fantasy-novel-hero#comments Fri, 18 Jul 2014 15:57:35 +0000 David Roth 2005 at http://theclassical.org Germany Wins World Cup, Saves The World http://theclassical.org/articles/germany-wins-world-cup-saves-the-world <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> SB Tang </div> </div> </div> <p> Germany deserved to win the 2014 World Cup. But this was not just a victory for smart soccer and savvy talent development and ultilization, although it was also that. It&#39;s also a win for multiculturalism, youth education, the Eurozone economy, and the Spanish olive industry. Let&#39;s celebrate.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/germany-wins-world-cup-saves-the-world" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/germany-wins-world-cup-saves-the-world#comments Thu, 17 Jul 2014 18:14:47 +0000 David Roth 2004 at http://theclassical.org Yakkin' About Baseball: Chris Berman's Spoken World Album http://theclassical.org/articles/yakkin-about-baseball-chris-bermans-spoken-world-album <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> David Roth </div> <div class="field-item even"> David Raposa </div> </div> </div> <p> Goth Jayson Werth, Chris Berman&#39;s linguistic avant-gardeism, the Alan Smithee version of <em>Dune</em>, and the other upsetting things one things about while being traumatized by the Home Run Derby.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/yakkin-about-baseball-chris-bermans-spoken-world-album" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/yakkin-about-baseball-chris-bermans-spoken-world-album#comments Wed, 16 Jul 2014 21:18:49 +0000 David Roth 2002 at http://theclassical.org Demolishing The Ruins In Cleveland http://theclassical.org/articles/demolishing-the-ruins-in-cleveland <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Chris Manning </div> </div> </div> <p> It&#39;s not that LeBron returning to the Cavaliers changes everything -- or even anything -- about Cleveland sports. It&#39;s more that, as revealed on a trip to the Indians game on the first night of the second LeBron Era, it feels as if things have changed.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/demolishing-the-ruins-in-cleveland" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/demolishing-the-ruins-in-cleveland#comments Tue, 15 Jul 2014 16:02:56 +0000 David Roth 2000 at http://theclassical.org Gone In 32 Seconds, Or The U.S. After Brazil 2014 http://theclassical.org/articles/gone-in-32-seconds-or-the-us-after-brazil-2014 <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Michael Terry </div> </div> </div> <p>With every World Cup comes the question of whether <em>this</em> one will be the one that makes the U.S. finally fall in love with soccer. An anecdotal survey of bars and fans during Brazil 2014 suggests that this one was indeed different. But maybe it&#39;s the question that&#39;s the problem.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/gone-in-32-seconds-or-the-us-after-brazil-2014" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/gone-in-32-seconds-or-the-us-after-brazil-2014#comments Mon, 14 Jul 2014 15:43:34 +0000 David Roth 1998 at http://theclassical.org Growing Up Inside The World Cup http://theclassical.org/articles/growing-up-inside-the-world-cup <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Diana Moskovitz </div> </div> </div> <p> Everything is different in South Florida. And during the World Cup, this most unusual part of the country is like nowhere else. For a South Floridian watching her first World Cup outside of World Cup World, it makes for one hell of a culture shock.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/growing-up-inside-the-world-cup" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/growing-up-inside-the-world-cup#comments Fri, 11 Jul 2014 17:32:38 +0000 David Roth 1997 at http://theclassical.org Great Fighters, Great Fights, And Everything Else http://theclassical.org/articles/great-fighters-great-fights-and-everything-else <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Josh Tucker </div> </div> </div> <p> Ronda Rousey, Chris Weidman, and Lyoto Machida are really good at sports. There&#39;s more to it than that, given that this is the UFC we&#39;re talking about, but there doesn&#39;t necessarily need to be.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/great-fighters-great-fights-and-everything-else" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/great-fighters-great-fights-and-everything-else#comments Thu, 10 Jul 2014 16:33:03 +0000 David Roth 1996 at http://theclassical.org Strangelove In Philadelphia http://theclassical.org/articles/strangelove-in-philadelphia <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Patrick Sauer </div> </div> </div> <p> Or, How I Learned To Stop Worrying About Sam Hinkie&#39;s Endless And Semi-Sadistic Rebuilding Of The 76ers And Love The Process.</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/strangelove-in-philadelphia" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/strangelove-in-philadelphia#comments Mon, 07 Jul 2014 16:39:27 +0000 David Roth 1992 at http://theclassical.org The U.S., The World Cup, And Life After Death http://theclassical.org/articles/the-us-the-world-cup-and-life-after-death <div class="field field-type-nodereference field-field-op-author"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Connor Huchton </div> </div> </div> <p> Well, that was painful. Also, that was great.&nbsp;</p> <div class="field field-type-text field-field-main-image-suppress"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item odd"> Hide main image on article page? </div> </div> </div> <p><a href="http://theclassical.org/articles/the-us-the-world-cup-and-life-after-death" target="_blank">read more</a></p> http://theclassical.org/articles/the-us-the-world-cup-and-life-after-death#comments Wed, 02 Jul 2014 18:07:16 +0000 David Roth 1991 at http://theclassical.org